John Sovec - Psychotherapy

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The Darkness of Teen Depression

As scary and lonely as it may feelTeen depression when a teenager is lost in depression it is important to know that there is a way out of the darkness and that they don’t have to go it alone. It is important for a parent to be comfortable with talking with their teenager about the intense feelings that come up when depression is present in their teen’s life.

Rather than talking down to their teens parents should validate the feelings that are being expressed and simply acknowledge the sadness and pain that is being shared.

Try to listen to your teen without feeling you have to solve the issues at hand. Having a place to share where there are not criticized or judged can make a teen feel heard. It is not always necessary to have a solution; in fact sometime it is fine just to be a safe haven for sharing.

Although your teen may be resistant to sharing what’s going on, if you feel that things are serious enough, don’t give up. Share that this is a tough conversation for you as well but that you are there to give them a place to unburden their fears and doubts.

It is not necessary to ask a ton of questions or even grill your teen during these conversations. Instead provide clear and steady support. Be willing to be helpless and provide whatever reassurance they may need. Working with the support of friends, family, and a compassionate knowledgably therapist who specializes in working with teens can make the journey back from depression a challenging but manageable one.


Comments
Karen Levanduski, MFT
- 20 September 2011 at 09:10
Hi John. Your guidance for parents dealing with a depressed teen is so well written. So many parents want to "do something" and do not realize that "listening" is in fact "doing something". I completely agree with your recommendation to parents.
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John Sovec, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. MFC #46376